Please read before reading the rest of the text below:
After seeing the amount of wolfaboos on places such as deviantART, YouTube, Facebook etc, I thought it would be interesting to try and reconstruct the life of the average wolfaboo and get an insight to just how arrogant and pathetic these uneducated people are. Another thing to point out is that the text below is written in decent-enough English, and that a wolfaboo would rarely, if ever, type/ write like that, just so you know.
The daily life of a Wolfaboo...
Saturday morning. I woke up and saw it was 11:00am, but I remembered that having the wolf as my inner animal meant I had to stay up late last night and howl at the moon when my mother had gone out. I growled and stretched like a wolf would, because after all, I am a wolf, right? I looked at all my wolf books and stories all over my messy bedroom. I saw my Wolf's Rain DVDs, and I sighed with happiness. It was all true. Wolves really can leap at very high altitude, have a paradise of their own and can tear through thick metal armor with their bare teeth. Wolves are just soooo awesome, anyone who says they aren't or hates them are just stupid. Who could possibly hate the precious wolves that live on this earth?
So anyway, I went downstairs and saw that mother had left some Weetabix for me to eat for breakfast. EW, WEETABIX! I couldn't eat that. It wasn't meat, and wolves eat meat. So I decided to rummage through the fridge and I found some uncooked bacon. Being the lowest intelligent student in my food class, I obviously ate the meat raw. Yum, yum. It felt so great to have the wolf as part of me. I went upstairs and had a wash (although I hated it because wolves don't wash except with their tongues) and went to get dressed. I rummaged through my wardrobe and draws, and decided to wear my favorite "save the wolves" t-shirt and a torn pair of jeans (which I liked to believe were savaged by wolves) and decided to go on the computer. I went on DA and I was so happy. There were wolf drawings EVERYWHERE, but that's obvious really, because wolves are so awesome and only an idiot would say they're not. I saw some really cool drawings of some anime wolves and made-up wolves people had drawn. They had such amazing features like purple fur, green hair, bloody claws and teeth with lyrics from the song "Animal I have become". Then when I clicked on one drawing, I saw someone saying the wolf looked rather hideous and that wolves aren't' even cool. The wolf rage in me boiled inside, and I decided to reply to that wolf-hater comment:
"OMG. HOW DARE U DISRISPECTE WOLFS. I HAVE A WOOF AS MY INNER ANIMAL. YOU IDIOT! ME AND MY PACK R GONNA HUNT U DOWN AND MAKE U SORRY FOR HATING WOOFS. GRRR, IM SERIUS ABOUT DIS!!!!"
I was so angry. How COULD they say that? Wolves deserve to live forever and humans should just die. Anyway, I also decided to talk to some of my wolf friends online, and tell them how I "almost shifted" into a wolf last night. They were totally ecstatic, the conversation went a little something like this:
Me: So i wuz like AROOOOO, and den de shifting pains started, i felt so woof like, wolfs r so cool.
Friend: omg, dat is totaly awesum. wolfs r like de best creechurs ever, they r so majestik and speshul. i have a woof as my inner animal too!
Me: wot is ur woof name?
Me: omg, dat is like sooo awsume. its totaly orignal and no one else has a name lik dat!
Friend: wots urs?
Friend: dat is awsum!
When I was on YouTube watching a "save the wolves" video, I saw a load of hater and dislike replies in the comment section. Once again the wolf inside of me raged. BECAUSE WOLVES ARE, LIKE, THE BEST ANIMALS IN THE WORLD. I started threatening those evil wolf hunters, and I called them names like "evil humans" and "anti-Christs". I said I would kill them with my pack and wolves would get their revenge. I also said that humans were sooo evil and that wolves are better in every way. Me and my fellow wolf friends decided to team up and try and beat the anti-wolf community. I mean, come on, who could hate wolves? But then I saw this comment:
User: I hate wolves. Grey wolves aren't even endangered, and they are a nuisance and danger to people, which is why I support hunting.
I almost fainted when I saw that comment. GREY WOLVES ARE ENDANGERED. ITS TRUE! All those humans, so cruel and nasty! I am sooo glad I have the wolf as my inner animal and spirit, I would hate to be pure human. I started ranting about how my life sucked as being "part" human, and that the wolf inside of me was raging to be free. Anyone who says I am not a wolf is stupid. People can turn into wolves! Its true, because my friends have done it, even though they have posted no evidence whatsoever! WOLVES ARE AWESOME!